


What is This That it Is?

by Perpetual Motion (perpetfic)



Category: Generation Kill
Genre: But it's there, Gen, M/M, Pappy/Rudy is implied, because married
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 09:29:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2807666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perpetfic/pseuds/Perpetual%20Motion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nate, in Afghanistan and Iraq, tries to make sense of Rudy and Pappy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What is This That it Is?

Of everything Nate was expecting in Afghanistan, the sheer existence of Rudy and Pappy is what shocks him most. He is aware of how odd this is. He's killed men here. Saw their blood spurt from their heads, but he was expecting to do that. He's a Marine in a war. He will kill if he is called upon to do so.

Rudy and Pappy though. Nate feels like he's witnessing a fever dream on masculinity when he watches them. Pappy, the quietest man Nate has ever met, and Rudy, the most effusive. Pappy, who sings Bluegrass songs passed down from his Great-Granny, and Rudy, who hums Enya as he cleans his gun. They are the most effective sniper team Nate has ever seen, and he's glad to have them at his disposal, but he just can't figure them out.

He mentions it to his Gunny, who looks confused to even be consulted. “I don’t have an answer, Sir,” he says, and it makes Nate hurt that this good, well-trained man hasn’t been trusted with his officer’s weirdness before.

“Forget I said anything, Gunny,” Nate says, and it hurts him again to know he didn’t even have to say that to know that this man has already wiped the conversation from his mind.

*

Recurring dreams are a sign of malaria, Nate knows because part of OCS is getting the living shit scared out of you when it comes to infectious diseases. When he sees Rudy and Pappy again, he wonders if it’s a recurring dream. But it’s not. Just two incredibly talented men who work together in a way Nate can’t quite comprehend. It feels like one of those little plastic puzzles his parents used to buy him on road trips; a single number missing, and the rest to figure out and put into the proper place. It feels like he’s missing the obvious clue of how to understand it.

He mentions it to Mike, and it’s only after he’s said it that he worries Mike will be like the Gunny in Afghanistan and think his Lieutenant should be politely brushed off rather than talked to like a goddamn person.

Mike quirks his mouth, and then he says in a friendly tone like there’s no rank between them, "Nothing to understand. Some guys, they just work like that."

"I know," Nate replies. "But it's seeing it, Mike. They're just..."

"They're married to the job when they're on it," Mike says. "So, they're married to each other. It’s a work-wife situation. Or a weekend wife.”

“Weekend wife?” Nate asks.

“It’s what my wife calls her best friend. They always spend Sundays together.”

“Oh,” Nate says. He considers that explanation. He thinks about the way Rudy checks Pappy's shave and makes sure he's eaten. He thinks about how Pappy will sit next to Rudy when Rudy's looking beat and Rudy will lean on him like he’s the bigger of the two instead of the other way around. "Maybe," Nate says. "But that's not quite it. They're...it's different. Hell, Mike, I don't know. I've just never seen two men less likely to be friends, I guess."

"Rudy could be friends with a dead tree stump," Mike says.

Nate can only chuckle in agreement, but it still nags at him, trying to figure it out. It's a stupid thing to concentrate on, he knows, but maybe that's why he can't shake it. Men distract themselves in war in any number of ways: porn, combat jacks, books about war, bargaining for the rat-fuck stash, shit-talking. Trying to unravel Rudy and Pappy, Nate thinks, may just be his own version.

"Lieutenant," Rudy says one day, walking over to Nate with his coffee pot as Nate passes within a couple of meters. "Get your blood going, Sir?"

He should say no, Nate thinks. He's an officer, and Rudy's enlisted, and everyone sitting around the tiny fire is enlisted. But Nate sees Pappy walking up to the group, and he can't help his curiosity. "Sure," he says, holding out his cup. Rudy beams at him like he's hung the moon and pours him a measure.

"Rudy!" Pappy says, and when Rudy turns and looks at him, Nate realizes Rudy was just smiling at him in that general friendly way he has. But the smile he's aimed at Pappy, _that's_ the smile of a man who thinks the man he's looking at has hung the moon and the stars and at least four of the planets.

"Brother!" Rudy replies like they haven't seen each other in days, even though Nate knows they only unloaded from their Victors an hour ago. "Coffee?"

"Hell, yes," Pappy agrees, holding out his cup. He touches Rudy's hand when Rudy pours. "You burn yourself?" he asks, and Nate only sees the small, shiny spot on the back of Rudy’s hand now that Pappy’s noticed it so quickly.

"Nothing to worry about," Rudy says. "Already got some Vitamin E cream on it. You should use it, actually; it'll help you out with those dry spots you've been having."

"It smell like anything?" Pappy asks.

"Of course not. I wouldn't offer if it did. I know it’s not for you.”

Nate looks at the other men around the fire, wondering if they're seeing what he's seeing, this deeply domestic, caring scene in front of him. None of the other men are paying Rudy and Pappy the least attention, just drinking their coffee and shit-talking amongst themselves. You can learn a lot from your men, Nate thinks, and he steps away from the circle with only one backward glance at Rudy and Pappy, who are standing so close together their noses are almost touching.

"I think they're in love," Nate says to Mike that night.

Mike doesn't ask who he's talking about, just shrugs and says, "Well, we've got regs for that."

"Yeah," Nate agrees. "You think they're in love?"

"I think they're Marines," Mike says. "And damn good ones."

"So shut up," Nate replies.

"Let the record show you said that, Sir," Mike says, with a touch of emphasis on the title.

"Copy that," Nate says, and that's the last they talk about it.

**Author's Note:**

> Much love to templemarker for a great beta. Any leftover issues are on me.


End file.
